What to Do If You Sent Money to a Romance Scammer

What should you do first?

Stop communicating with the person and do not send anything else. Then contact the company that handled the payment right away. The FTC advises telling them you paid a scammer and asking for a refund. A refund is not guaranteed, but acting quickly gives you the best chance.

How do you report each type of payment?

• Bank transfer, such as Zelle: report it to your bank or credit union and ask them to reverse it and refund you.
• Payment app, such as Venmo, Cash App or PayPal: report it to the app and ask for a reversal and refund.
• Wire transfer, such as Western Union or MoneyGram: tell the company a scammer tricked you into sending the money and ask for a refund.
• Credit or debit card: use the number on the back of the card, or your online account or app, and ask for a refund.
• Gift card: call the number on the back of the card, say a scammer tricked you into giving the card number and PIN, and ask for a refund. Keep the card and receipt if you have them.
• Cryptocurrency: contact the exchange or ATM operator, say the transaction was fraudulent, and ask them to reverse it and refund you. The FTC notes crypto lacks the legal protections cards have, though some state laws may help.
• Cash by US mail: call the U.S. Postal Inspection Service at 1-877-876-2455. For a fee, it can intercept a domestic package that has not been delivered. For other carriers, contact them as soon as possible.

Where should you report the scam?

Report it to the FTC at ReportFraud.ftc.gov and to the dating app or social network where you met. The FTC also suggests your state attorney general if you paid someone claiming they could recover your losses.

What if you shared personal details or account access?

• Social Security number: if it was used, report it at IdentityTheft.gov for a recovery plan. If it was not used, or you are unsure, follow the steps at IdentityTheft.gov/databreach.
• An account login: if you can still get in, set a new strong password, change it anywhere you reused it, and turn on two-factor authentication.
• Access to your phone or computer: update or install security software, run a scan, delete anything it flags, then change your passwords.

Can someone recover the money for you?

Be very careful. The FTC warns that recovery scammers buy lists of past victims and contact them, often claiming to be from a government agency, a consumer group or a law firm. They may ask for a retainer, processing fee or administrative charge, or for financial details to send a refund.

The FTC's advice is never to pay up front for help getting a refund. Look up an agency's contact details yourself rather than using a number the caller gives you.

How can you tell for sure it was a scam?

You may never get certainty, and you do not need it to report a payment. The FTC suggests a reverse image search of the profile photo, since a photo tied to another name is a warning sign. It also suggests searching the person's job plus the word scammer, and talking to a friend or relative you trust.

Can CheaterExposer help after a scam?

It cannot recover money or trace payments. CheaterExposer searches public web results and public profiles, and it cannot see private accounts, messages, deleted accounts or app activity. A result is a lead to verify, and no result proves nothing. If you have paid a scammer, your bank or payment company and the FTC are the right first steps.